On Remembering Passion Week

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I need to cry my own full-throated “Hosanna’s,” free of illusions but awake to my naked needs.
I need to climb the hill, to look down over the city, and to weep for her lost innocence.
I need to feel desperation again; to feel it in the temple pilgrims who dared to hope He might be real, and He might be good.
I need to see Him heal the broken—on His own terms, and out of order.
I need to listen to His stories. Vibrant, full of mystery scandal, and hope.
I need to hear the clinking of coins, the crashing of tables, and the roaring of a Lion.
I need to follow the weary One, who ducks the crowds to rest with those who know Him most.
I need to weep with Mary, to anoint Him with my tears.
I need to smell the perfume and indignation, gratitude and greed, juxtaposed like clashes of ancient hoards.
I need to recline against His breast, like John.
I need to marvel at the Emperor of the Stars, scrubbing mud from traveled toes.
I need to suffer weariness, yet stay awake and pray with Him.
I need the crow of the rooster to siphon pride from my bones.
I need to cry with Him in His torture, even while they run.
I need to forgive, even while they shout, “Crucify Him.”
I need to know the weight of injustice on my chest, for “this man has done nothing wrong.”
I need to understand what blood and water means—that there exists a grief which kills faster than torture.
I need to mourn. Oh, but I need to mourn…
I need to light a candle for Him—an old, out of fashion candle fitting for the saints of old—to remember that my faith is not new, and its goal is not relevance.

And before night’s weeping turns to morning’s joy, I need bow my head and speak the five most insufficient words I know:
Thank you for saving me.

Why I’m Still a “Christian,” Not a “Follower of Christ”

Yes, I know they’re the same. To be a Christian is to follow Jesus. And I like the fact that “Follower of Christ” is more vivid and precise. It’s a great term. But I am not going to rush out and change my Twitter bio. “Christian” is good enough for me.

I understand why many do it. They want to say, “I don’t need chalky, legalistic Phariseeism. Just give me Jesus.” I have no problem with this.

But others do it for another reason: they want to distance themselves from Christians. I saw a Twitter update from popular pastor some months back. He was decrying the political actions of Christians he disagreed with. His embarrassment was obvious, and he used the incident to demonstrate why he no longer called himself a “Christian.”

Look, Christians of all stripes and affiliations have played the moron. Worse yet, some have been hateful and cruel. At such times, it is appropriate to say, “This is not me. This is not Christ.”

But is it right to then throw away the name based on distant association?

Ravi Zacharias said this: “To judge a worldview, philosophy or religion based on its abuse is flawed logic.” We know this is true. It is why our culture goes to battle against stereotypes of all kinds. We don’t judge the Muslim in the coffee shop for an act of terrorism abroad. We don’t pin the crimes of Mao Tse Tong on the college student who is enamored with atheism or Communism.

Neither do we demand that they change their names.

Do I think Christians are always right? Of course not..
Have Christians have done awful things in the past? Some have, yes.
Am I sometimes embarrassed by the statements and actions of men and women who call themselves Christians? Every time I flip past certain TV stations…

But despite the crusades, despite the fact that many self-proclaimed Christians were pro-slavery back in the day, and despite the fact that some have too much eyeliner and ridiculous big hair, I will continue to call myself a Christian.

If I stop, I distance myself further from the historical church. I say “you have all been wrong about everything.” I say “None of you got it, so I am starting over right now.” The church has grown and morphed and fought and split and worshipped and cherished. She has been ghastly wrong and gloriously right. She has given and earned black eyes, but she has also touched with healing hands.

Therefore, I will not throw the church under the bus. I will not weaken my link with St. Francis of Assisi, Mother Teresa of Calcutta, or the Apostle Paul in order to appease a cultural stereotype. I want to honor the memories of Wesley and Wilberforce, Lewis and Tolkien, of the saints thrown to lions, and of my own Grandfather, George Hague, who prayed with fire. I will even remember John Calvin.

Because all of our high-minded blog posts and reinventions would not exist without shoulders of saints on which to stand. We would not be tinkering with our own labels were it not for these men and women. These historical followers of Christ.

These Christians.